Author's Perspective

I enjoy exploring complex issues, and polyamory is no exception. However I don't self-identify as polyamorous because the lack of consensus within the poly community on key issues leaves so much open to interpretation that using the label is of little practical value, and in my experience causes more problems than it solves.

That being said, the concepts and ideals upon which polyamory was founded, make it the most fair-minded, and healthy way of looking at relationships I can think of. In other words, polyamory is fine in principle, but the social politics of it are another matter.

Without unity within the poly community, those who self-identify as poly are vulnerable to being misinterpreted about the way they look at relationships. The problems outlined on the Reasons For Caution page will also remain very difficult if not impossible to eliminate.

Therefore it is my hope that the lines of thinking outlined on this site will eventually become commonplace in the poly community. Perhaps polyamory can then gain the momentum it needs to move to the forefront as a social movement, and the world will be a better place for it.

In the meantime, for all its problems, mono culture is at least unified with respect to how it defines itself. Do I think that makes it a good choice? No. For the reasons outlined on the Nature Versus Nurture and Benefits pages, I cannot honestly self-identify as mono either. For that matter I don't know how anyone who really thinks about it can.


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